Well, I'm goin' ta Heaven next Tuesday. Some Christian sold his soul on e-bay an I bought it for 39 bucks! Free shipping! He needed bus fare to see his Mom, who was dying of gout, or a broken heart, or something.
So, I told him! Man you gotta sign that sum bitch in blood, dude! Cause it ain't no good, if you don't! So, he did an I got it here.
So, I did a lot of research on "Coast to Coast" an all them places an was able to buy this vial of fairy dust. It's the real stuff. Real sparkly! It was real expensive, but it's Heaven right!
So! Next Tuesday! Puttin" the old 45 in my mouth and headed for the promised land!
Just wanna thank the folks at E-bay, and the dude who lost his soul to help his Momma! Maybe God'll give him a break! I don't know about that stuff.
But his Mom'll be happy and all. Not dead.
Cause of us an' how we worked it all out real smart.
If God wasn't up there, just think how lost we'd be!